Thursdays are wicked cool

At least during November sweeps. That's because Wednesday night packs the one-two punch of Lost and The Apprentice: Martha Stewart. So many mysteries to unravel! So many business lessons to learn! So many Others to impale! So many type-a lunatics to judge!

Last night's Lost told the story of the tail-enders' first 48 days on the island. Since the island in question is not nearly as fabulous as the one on which Fabian found himself after surviving the sinking of the talk show cruise ship, you know some serious shit went down. Turns out Ana-Lucia has compelling reasons for being such a paranoid bitch. Not only have the children been hauled away in the night, but also she must contend with creepy murderous infiltrators who may or may not be who they say they are. My mind was aflutter with guesses as to the identity of the Other among them: first I thought it was Bernard, given his significant hesitation before he could answer the simple question, "What's your name?" Then I thought it was red-herring Nathan -- Ethan, Nathan, get it? I'm still a little suspicious of Libby; her khaki, ragged wardrobe isn't helping. But it turns out that it was Goodwin, the fellow, we learned a few weeks ago, who is rotting in the jungle with a sharp stick protruding from his chest. Good riddance.

Even though Ana-Lucia apparently killed Shannon (and I would root for Sayid in any match between them), I have to give Lost some credit for making me like Ana, understand her motivations and care about her well-being. If I'd found a glass eye in a dark bunker on a mysterious island onto which I'd violently crashlanded, I'd expect some sympathy, too.

Speaking of a glass eye (Amanda's eye cancer revelation to Fran Drescher) and the evolution of previously heinous characters (Jim)...yesterday's MarthApprentice was chock full of goodness, too. How could it not be, what with lesbian Alexis' lobsterrific boat ride with the winning team?

Most interesting is Jim's ongoing development from incoherent manic asshole to semi-coherent manic asshole who maybe does care, somewhere, very deep down. His pep talk to Marcela before the conference room goodbye-ing (can't really call it a "firing") was right-on. I'm sure he did it because he's keeping the weak around so as to improve his own pathetic chances, but it was nice that someone saw through Amanda's and Ryan's cruel and idiotic sabotage.

Now that we're down to the final six, a prediction: Leslie is going to win this thing:

1. Jim = too unstable for the real world of MSLO.
2. Dawna = forehead wrinkles too pronounced.
3. Bethenny = kind of stupid, plus unnecessarily bitchy and self-righteous.
4. Ryan = cute but backstabbing. Nobody at MSLO is allowed to backstab except Martha herself.
5. Marcela = a Mexican Martha Stewart, yes, but too weak to stand up for herself. Martha would eat her alive and then stuff and mount her next to the Tarpon on Lily Pond Lane.

That leaves Leslie. She is Latina and can therefore help Martha crack the elusive tablecloth-closet-having Latin American market. She is a good saleswoman and natural in front of a camera. She is not offensive, at least not that I've noted. So, go Leslie.

And go me, for having so many in-depth points of view on this crap.